Weight Watchers has a special program geared toward breastfeeding mothers. It works for many people. It did not work for me. After a couple weeks on the program, I started noticing a dip in my supply, but I figured things were simply regulating. My son was getting enough to eat, I was losing weight, and I could occasionally pump a bottle for my freezer stash. All was well, until I went back to work. Almost immedieatly, I noticed a difference in supply. I was only pumping about 4oz total per session, and bringing home at most 8oz a day. Dylan eats more than that, so my freezer stash began to dwindle. Over the next few weeks, I denied it. I just figured I don’t make that much milk this time, and soon we would supplement with formula. Then the problem started getting worse. Dylan would eat off both sides and still not seem full. He wasn’t fussing for more, but he was no longer falling into those “milk comas” like he had before. Even with that, I still wanted to diet. I wanted to lose weight. I thought maybe if I could take a day off the program here and there, or drink Mother’s Milk Tea, my supply would pick up. It didn’t.
About a week ago, after I had lost another pound and a half, I decided to give up Weight Watchers for now. I have mixed emotions about this. I felt really motivated to lose weight, and though I was doing it slowly, I was losing. However, feeding my son is more important. I know I could just supplement with formula if I can’t keep up with his needs, and I may have to do that eventually anyway (both my other kids had formula at some point or another). I feel though since I have to pump regardless, I want to make enough for him to eat. And it’s working. My milk supply has increased this last week by 4oz per day.
The bad news: I can’t do any sort of diet, and I’m no good at “watching what I eat”. That’s why WW works so well for me: it allows me to eat pretty much whatever, just not as much. I have trouble doing that without the accountability of the plan. But I will try.
The good news: I should be able to provide enough milk for Dylan where we won’t have to buy any formula. Also, I think I will burn more calories since I’m producing more milk, so I could still lose weight.
I also had to do some real reflecting. I have NEVER cared this much how I look. Why do I now? Is it because my size 4 sister in law thinks she’s fat- what does she think of me then? Is it because my cousin, who at 9 months pregnant weighs less than I do now? No. I think it’s because I know for sure I’m done having kids, and I’m just ready to have my body back. I’m ready to be happy with the way I look. I’m ready to not feel so big, so flabby. And I have no patience, so in the words of Veruca Salt, I want it NOW. I think that’s why I let it get so far before admitting to myself I had to change or risk my milk drying up entirely. For the other kids, the weight all came off by the time they were 9 months old, so I’m hopeful I’ll at least lose 15 more pounds in the next 6 months. We’ll see. Either way, I’m okay. I have to be. Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
